By REY FLORES
“Lord, please break the laws of the universe for my convenience, Amen” — Emo Philips.
That quotation from comedian Emo Philips from the 1985 Cinemax Comedy Experiment broadcast just about sums it up for many in the modern-day Catholic Church.
In that same monologue, Philips told another joke about how when he was a little boy, he used to pray to God for a new bicycle, but then he realized that the Lord did not operate that way. So Philips instead stole a bicycle and asked for forgiveness. Nevertheless, he got his bicycle.
That is also a good analogy for the modern-day average, run-of-the-mill Catholic who comes and goes with the popular cultural winds, not wanting to offend anyone with outdated doctrine or those pesky Commandments of the Old Testament.
The modernist secular society wants us to believe that in today’s Church, it is “OK to be gay,” and if you are a nun, you better be on that Obamacare bus with the rest of the pantsuit nuns. Otherwise, if you speak to kids about immorality and dangers to souls, you’ll get thrown right under that bus, habit and all.
A headline from The Washington Post reads: “Same-sex marriage is new test for Catholic institutions used to ‘don’t ask, don’t tell’.”
This isn’t a “new test” of any kind. First, the Catholic Church has always stood by her tenets and principles and, most important, the laws of God. Second, there is no such thing as “same-sex marriage” because it never was, is not, and never will be marriage, period.
There apparently is no end to how much hatred the mainstream news propaganda outlets have against the Catholic Church. Many “middle-of-the-road Catholics” continue to imbibe it, with the consequence that over 50 percent of self-professed Catholics voted for a pro-abortion, pro-homosexualist president twice.
Borrowing a term from the current popular vernacular, “self-identifying” Catholics tend to follow the Emo Philips School of Theology. By “self-identifying,” I mean that many may call themselves Catholic, but refuse to take responsibilities as Catholics and abide by the obligations we as Catholics must abide by if we truly do want to save our souls.
Sadly, it isn’t just the namby-pamby, fly-by-the-seat-of-your-pants Catholics who have caused this disruption, but the priests and even bishops who have been right there with them.
None of this is news to Wanderer readers, but after a week of watching a nun get ostracized by a bunch of completely clueless, malformed so-called Catholic parents at Charlotte Catholic High School, I have to again pinch myself to see if I’m awake or if this is just a nightmare that won’t end.
In a more positive vein, Kirsten Anderson reported the following April 7 for LifeSiteNews about the Charlotte situation:
“The bishop of Charlotte is backing a Dominican nun who has been at the center of a fiery controversy since last month when she gave a speech promoting Catholic teaching on sexuality to students at Charlotte Catholic High School.
“After a public meeting with diocesan and school officials turned ugly, with parents and students alike shouting at administrators over what they perceived as ‘hateful’ remarks criticizing homosexual behavior, divorce and extramarital sex, a spokesman for the diocese told LifeSiteNews that the nun in question, Sr. Jane Dominic Laurel, did nothing wrong and will be welcome to speak on the issue again if she chooses.
“ ‘Nothing in sister’s talk opposed Church teaching,’ Diocese of Charlotte Communications Director David Hains told LifeSiteNews in an e-mail. ‘Sister would be welcomed to speak in the diocese in the future.’
“Hains said Bishop Peter Jugis is expected to make further public comment on the situation soon.”
Will the parents who complained about the allegedly graphic nature of Sr. Jane Dominic Laurel’s presentation to the student body at that school refuse to climb aboard the politically correct bandwagons of “reproductive justice” and “marriage equality”?
So many parents around the country might complain about a nun warning kids about the dangers of pornography and the detriments of a culture of divorce, but as soon as the local infiltrators from Planned Parenthood want to teach their kids how to put a condom on a banana, they are touting the need for “comprehensive sex education.”
The asylum is being run by the patients.
The insanity is happening across the land, coast to coast and down in South America as well.
For those of you who have been following my column the past couple of months, you’ve probably read about all of the parishes being used for partisan political activities that are inviting pro-abortion and pro-homosexual politicians to deceive Catholics in our own Church.
Now, just in time for Lent, an LGBT lenten retreat is being held in Palm Springs, Calif., where one of the priests organizing the event reportedly said that “this retreat is not about changing a person” (see cal-catholic.com, April 8).
Heading back east near the nation’s loony-bin capital, we have the recently “married” homosexual music director who lost his job at the parish he worked at when the pastor found out about his “wedding” to another man, as reported April 7 in The Washington Post. At least he had enough sense to seek out a similar position at a nearby “gay-friendly” Protestant church, but not without the obligatory whining to the press.
Then there’s the baby who was recently baptized in a Catholic church in Argentina: This poor child was adopted by two lesbians who call themselves the child’s “mothers.” LifeSiteNews reports that observers feel this is a ploy to subvert Church teaching on marriage.
Again — who is running the show here? The whole Church today is like one bad Arnold Schwarzenegger movie where he has to baby-sit a roomful of rambunctious children and nobody pays attention to him until the day-care center is almost burnt down to the ground.
At least in those dumb movies, the hero saves the day before the movie ends.
I hope and pray Pope Francis can save the day with all of these rambunctious, disobedient children in our Church.
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(Rey Flores is a Catholic writer and speaker. Contact Rey at firstname.lastname@example.org.)