By DONALD DeMARCO
Couples, Awaken Your Love by Robert Cardinal Sarah; Ignatius Press, San Francisco, 2021, 138 p., translated by M. Miller, $15.95.
Robert Cardinal Sarah’s reliability, orthodoxy, clarity of thought, and his love for people have been well established in his several books, especially, for this reviewer, in his 2019 book, The Day Is Now Far Spent (350 pages). In Couples, Awaken Your Love, he turns his attention from the broad problems of the world and of the Church to something more domestic — marriage.
In the main part of the book, he emphasizes two things. First, the importance of marriage and the family, and a truth repeated so often by St. John Paul II, that “The future of humanity passes through the family.” Therefore, Cardinal Sarah brings to the table a perspective that unites the present with the future. Secondly, the fact that in today’s world, marriage and the family are under attack by secular forces. Marriage is critically important, but it is in peril. A remedy is urgent. This book provides that remedy.
He begins by explaining to married couples that their union is a “chalice” and therefore contains something that is precious. Marriage has been raised to the dignity of a sacrament. Spouses should realize and take advantage of the treasure they are and the abundance of grace that is at their disposal.
The cardinal then goes on to explain how the Eucharist is a source of unity between husband and wife. God instituted marriage and “What God has joined, let no man put asunder.” The themes of mercy and forgiveness, faith, hope, and love, are highlighted and related to Scripture.
Part Two of the book deals with the specific challenges spouses face in today’s world. The great enemy is abortion. When Carlo Cardinal Caffarra was appointed as the first president of the John Paul II Institute for Studies on Marriage and the Family, he received a letter from Sr. Lucia of Fatima. The letter stated that “The final battle between the Lord and the kingdom of Satan will concern marriage and the family.” Abortion strikes at their very heart of marriage and the family. In addition, the “gender revolution” takes dead aim at the integrity of spousal and family life.
Concerning the mass media, Francis Cardinal Arinze is quoted as stating that it is “used to banalize, secularize, and even commercialize marriage and the family.”
Yet there is always hope. As Cardinal Sarah writes, “Our Christian families are like the multiple cells made by wax, fragile and always in need of reinforcement, which make up the hive, where everyone is called to taste the honey of Truth” (p. 96).
After reading about Cardinal Sarah’s treatment of the sacramental dignity of marriage and the war against spousal union, the reader may very well ask himself, “But what can I do?” In answering such a question, Cardinal Sarah has provided the tools that couples can use to strengthen their marriage, especially those whose marriages are in need of resuscitation.
His two Appendices provide these tools. The first invites husband and wife to pray together in accordance with a specific ritual that is to be repeated each day throughout the week. Prayer is powerful. Reciprocal listening is crucial.
The second Appendix provides a kind of “workshop” in which husband and wife take 10 minutes a day to disclose to one another, without interruption, what is in their hearts. The final prayer in the book closes with the following lines: “With you [Mary], we dare believe that from my suffering the luminous joy of Easter morning can shine forth.” A devotion to Mary permeates the entire book.
I strongly recommend this book not only for those who are married, but also for those who are contemplating marriage. It is a marvelous and harmonious blend of the theological and the pastoral.
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