Going Away To College

• 6 years ago

By REY FLORES

The time when we would say, “Our firstborn baby is going away to college,” once seemed to far away, but that day has finally arrived.

I’m sure many parents and families will be going through this bittersweet moment this summer and fall, just as many have before, and many will do the same in years to come. It is a rite of passage that none of us are ever really ready for, but we must accept it as part of life.

In today’s climate it is getting harder for Catholic families to choose a college which will maintain its Catholic identity, rather than to succumb to the secular forces which can rob our children of their faith.

Even once-Catholic schools like DePaul and Loyola Universities in Chicago have long been tainted by the modern culture. I recall giving a presentation to a group of students at DePaul. I had been invited by a local journalist who also taught at the school.

My talk was about how minorities were naturally social conservatives. The professor was a black woman with very liberal views, but I’ll hand it to her for inviting an opposing view to have a real discussion in her class.

I expected some blowback from some of the students, many of whom had already been tainted by the modern culture before arriving at this campus, but I was challenged most by a couple of students who identified as Catholic.

I couldn’t believe my ears at the mental gymnastics these kids were performing to spew out this secularist garbage. I found myself defending the unborn and traditional marriage between one man and one woman, at a Catholic college no less.

Anyway, I don’t mean to bash these two particular schools. But when even a time-honored Catholic institution like Georgetown covered an IHS symbol so as not to offend an invited speaker like then President Barack Obama, we have to truly ask ourselves as Catholic families: “What school will we send our kids to where they won’t lose their Catholic faith and identity?”

The school my daughter selected seems like a good school. Thankfully there are still good Catholic colleges and universities from which to pick, but I refrain from endorsing any one or more because that is a choice best left for future students and their families. We do recommend The Cardinal Newman Society (newmansociety.org) as a source for choosing the right Catholic college.

Whether our children leave for college or the military, these are life experiences that encompass a number of mixed emotions — melancholy and sadness, yet also the pride and joy of seeing our now-grown children take their first step into the world without someone holding their hand.

Watching one’s own children move thousands of miles away can be especially difficult. It’s difficult enough worrying about your kids crossing the street their entire life, or even riding their bikes safely, but this is when we must truly trust in God, knowing that only He loves our children more than we parents do. We must now put them fully in His care.

When our children leave the nest, an empty hole remains behind. The only thing we have left now are the memories of our children growing up, playing, laughing, crying, coming home every day, with us parents knowing they were safe with us.

Aside from eagerly awaiting each time my daughter will visit me again, I will cherish the memories of the many, but all-too-brief moments I spent with her. I’m sure she will also be going through some mixed emotions, but with young people, their desire to discover new things independently is usually the best remedy for overcoming any feelings of sadness.

I’ll share one of my favorite memories with my daughter Estrella. When she was around two or three years old, I used to love taking her for walks in our southside Chicago neighborhood, often rummaging through junk at yard sales.

One time I found a couple of old Sesame Street books from the 1970s. At that time, we kept our daughter as far away from television as possible, so our little girl had no idea who the Cookie Monster was, or any of the other characters from that show.

I spent hours on end, just lying on the grass in our tiny backyard, or on our living room rug, just reading to her and making her laugh with my impersonations of all of the Sesame Street characters. I like to think that those moments planted a seed in her mind and led her to her love of books and reading. I have never seen a kid love books as much as she did and still does.

My wife guided our children through homeschooling, prayer, and just basic commonsense knowledge, thus our daughter now has a thirst for even more knowledge and an incredible zest for life.

All of you parents who are sending off your kids off to college this fall deserve a pat on the back as well. You have sacrificed so much for your children throughout their entire lives. Congratulations on raising your children in the Lord and in the Catholic faith. May your lessons stay with them always!

Lastly, congratulations to all of you students going to college. May God be with you always! Make us even prouder.

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(Rey Flores writes opinion and book and movie reviews. Contact Rey at reyfloresusa@gmail.com.)